Hi, everybody, and welcome
to No Story is Sacred. If you've never listened before. Basically we're four siblings who grew
up talking about the artist storytelling. Now that we're adults, we're still talking about it and we're
inviting you to join the conversation. I'm Brendan and I just got out of Story Jail and I'm on parole now.
I need to plan a job. Hey, Pippen, are you available to
give story summaries for this? I I'm Pippen, and, you know, there's no one better than business
and got story summaries in May. All right? Yeah. Well, we need someone to, to do yo, uh, last minute interject. You know, the really witty stuff that
the rest of us don't think of. Wait, I know a guy. You know someone. Yeah. His name's Al. Hey, . Witty working. Wait, wait, wait. [Inaudible] are only funny if
you have the entire context. Alright. Just what we need. Perfect. For this job. Wait a second. Do, do you
think we need one more? I, I think we need one more. I think we need somebody who
speaks in paragraphs. What do you. Think? ? Someone. Who can confuse and, and,
uh, confound the audience. Yeah. Uhhuh. . Keep. Going. Someone that, someone that,
uh, that can and find a moral, or who writing moral Well
in the weirdest places. What, even if there isn't one there. Right? Especially. Oh. You. Know, I think I know someone. . Damn. Their name's Kat . I'm Kat. And thank you so
much for bringing me here. And I'd like to say that the, the largest, bigger reason that we're all here
together is for the camaraderie, the, the symbolism behind having
a group, and honestly, the collaborative effort behind
creative work. , are we in? Perfect. I think we're in. . We're in. McDonald's. Four . Fuck. Oh, I like, good, good job team. Considering that you guys didn't
fucking tell me you were doing that. because we're assholes. Yeah. But also I think this is a prime
example of my secret superpower, which is I can in fact do
that fucking paragraph shit. Find I moral and tie it to writing
all in one fucking go. Boom. . So, to. Be fair though, in my
defense, I only knew, I only knew like half of
what they were planning. . This was during the intro
part that you were around for. Did you care? Check out the Patreon later. . Anyway, what. Are we doing? What are we doing? What. Are we doing today? Yeah. What could it possibly fucking be? Who knows? Because today we are talking
about the 2001 movie Ocean's 11. So spoilers abound. If you want specific content warnings
about things we may talk about, check out the show notes
on no story sacred.com. . It's, I This is actually a case where it's
important to mention which y what year the movie came out. Yeah. Because Oh, yeah. It's a remake. Yeah. Which I, I have
never seen the original. Me neither, but yeah. Okay. We did decide not to
do that though. Like, fuck. That. Oh, it's like
the rat pack, isn't it? It is. Yeah. Well, also if you say Ocean's 11, everyone's gonna think of
this movie. Yeah, it's. True. Because this one's got
style and substance and, which. Is funny to say, we're not saying
that about the Rat Pack . It's, we also about, it's
got bra, it's got, uh, a Brad Pitt just eating
everything in sight, every, got. Everything. It's fur Mac, you
know, uh, rest in fucking peace. Yeah, I remember that partway through
the movie, and I was like, oh. Mm-hmm. . Oh man. It's got Don Cheatle. It does have not just British cockney. British. a thing I think
he's embarrassed about now. . I mean, I hope that his
kid, like, every goddamn day, just like walks up to him is
like, what's Barney like? Just. Or looks up Cockney St. . Just. To just throw, I was like,
oh, I thought you knew. or was like, oh, is
is, uh, uh, Dick Van Dyke? Did he come into the room just now?
No. Is he, nevermind my bad. . All right. Uh, we're
talking about Oceans 11, and for those of you who've
never seen Oceans 11, nice. Like. What? Uh, uh, the summary
according to Google, is Dapper Danny Ocean, dapper Dan Man. Uh, he is a man of action. Yeah. . It's. He's a man of that. Yes. Sorry. Sorry, sorry. Uh, fuck is a man of action. Listen, 24 hours into his parole from
a New Jersey penitentiary, the Rye charismatics Thief is
already rolling out his next plan, following three rules. Don't hurt anybody. Don't steal from anyone who
doesn't deserve it and play
the game like you've got nothing to lose. Danny Orchestrates
the most sophisticated, elaborate casino heist in history. With a great soundtrack. Oh, yeah. Oh yeah. Hmm. Uh. Lots of sax, right? Lots saxophone. Yeah. I think, uh, there's, well, there's
a lot of Elvis, like the old, like older Elvis, which is pretty cool.
Oh, yeah. Older conversation like that. Mm-hmm. , there's
more action, please. It's, it's Vegas. Come on. Yeah. Mm-hmm. . So, yeah. This is, this is
a, this is a heist movie. Y'all and heist are just fun, right? They. Are. Mm-hmm. .
They are. Yeah. Like, really. Like, they aren't good guys,
really. At the end of the day, they're, they're good people. There are no victimless crimes. That's true. And there's no ethical
heists under capitalism. That's true. Yeah. And technically all
that money he's insured. Technically. And on top of that, obviously
there's the issue of, uh, uh, uh, the central thing action
going on is a blood sport. Mm. Oh, yeah. Sorry. I have
feelings about boxing. I understand that it's very
important for the boxers themselves. I just have a lot of like, why are they all dressed up in
fancy clothes to watch this? People getting beaten into his
shit. Like, I, I die because. Because you dress up for the theater. But it's not even wrestling where
it's fake, you know? I mean, they literally, Ugh, I have feelings
anyway. My feelings. I'll see it. That's just the big event.
Distraction that's happening. Yeah. Uh, which is necessary for, you know. It, it's the big take night. Yeah. It's when all the money's going
to be right fucking there. Mm-hmm. . Because before we
get into all the character recruitment, the plan such as it is, is that they're going to
rob the casino's vault on the big fight night because by
rules established by the characters in the movie. Although, who knows if this
is actually true, probably isn't, uh, , and I don't ke I don't care to
actually look this up. Oh, fuck. Now, uh. Sometimes the moral thing in fiction is
to fucking lie about that sort of thing. Hell. Yeah. Here's the thing. Yeah.
Writers tell lies. What. What. For money. Oh, what my God. World shattered. Guys. I mean, wait till you find
out that standup is made up too. Oh. But that's observational humor. You
have to observe the thing . And exaggerate the crap
out of it. Um, those. Attitude Oaks totally happened. . Oh boo. Oh. The most true writer ever
made. Uh, so Raise the Glass. So the point I was making is that
Oh, yeah. Uh, on the fight night, uh, by the rules established in the,
the, in the theater, in the movie, uh, they have to have like all the
money mm-hmm. that, that they could possibly pay
out if everybody rolled ACEs or whatever. That's a mixed analogy that I
did on purpose. Uhhuh , uh. That's what they all. Say. So they, they have to have like, at least like 180 million on hand in order to cover all bets. Actually, that there may be a level
of that where that's actually true. Because I found out recently
that Blockbuster Uhhuh, when there was still Blockbuster
was required to have . That's apparently a theme
of the fucking evening, um, was apparently required to have every
single possible movie that people could rent and like, in multiple
copies. And so they had like, every blockbuster had like 50,000 fucking
movies or something like that. Um hmm. Maybe not 50, but certainly like 11 or
something. The point being that, uh, uh, as opposed to Netflix, which people consider to be so
convenient at any given time, only has about 4,000 movies up. Ooh. Part of our point, uh, is that, uh, fiscal media is a thing that
needs to make a research. And cuz fuck the digital economy. Fuck. Fuck. What? Secret themes. Secret themes. stuff making the subtext. Text. So, so, but the,
the take is $180 million, which is a lot of money, especially divided among 11 people. 11. Right. Where, huh? Where
are these 11 people coming. From? ? Well, it's at least a
third of the runtime recruiting them, uh, which is . Which is the best part of the film. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And
that's how it should be. Part of the point of the heist is
the cool people pulling it off. Otherwise it's just crime. Yeah. . And we have to have establishment
of these are cool people doing cool things, and why would they bother
coming to help out Danny Ocean before the plan is
even revealed? Mm-hmm. . And part of it, it's just that goddamn
George Clooney is just that charismatic. If he came into my house right
now and is like, Hey Brendan, I need you for a job. And
I'm like, okay, cool. Uh. But, but what kind of job church? Well, it's crime. It's crime. does a all know about this. Um,
like my interest? Yes. No matter what. I just wanna. Know . Like, is she scared at
this ? I'm, I'm down with this. I'm joking, you know, whatever, whatever. But yeah, no, like, he,
he's a charismatic guy and, and that helps with the
character. That is Danny Ocean, who is the one we open with in the
movie, who has just gotten out of jail. Uh, I for, I forget like
what he was busted for, but he's out on probation. He was busted for one thing.
Yeah. Which is relatively minor. Because they couldn't
get him on anything else. Yeah. Correct. He, they
were like, we've su we've, we have our person of interest in so
many other things. He was like, okay. , no proof there. And he flares up and down. He
will not commit a crime again. Mm-hmm. Won't do it. Can't say he will. Uh, I, I think he might even say,
well, the, uh, the first time was, uh, because of my wife. I
don't have one anymore, so what's gonna make me
do crime again? Such. A good question. . I mean. Spoiler, it's the wife. Um, what,
but for a different reason. Um. Foreshadowing. What? In this economy? My good movie .
You and I went different directions. happens more often
than you think. So like, he right away goes and recruits
Bernie Mac cuz he's like working at a casino in Atlantic City.
Convenient. Cuz that's also in New Jersey. And thus not violating parole yet. But he needs Bernie Mac in order
to find out where his butt is. Yeah. Cause he needs his
partner in crime. Uh, Brad Pitt, whose character is. Rusty Ri No. Yes. Yeah. Rusty Ryan. Yes. Are alliterative names. Uh,
and, and Brittany Mac's character is, uh, Frank. Mm-hmm. . So Yeah. So we, we already
get like, uh, I believe, uh, Britney Mac's character. Frank
is like a soft Yes. Right away. So he's gonna be like flying
off to Vegas to work, uh, the casino as like the inside guy. Mm-hmm. . Yeah. So he's already really, he was the first
recruitment and it's just like, yeah. He's, he's, he does crime and has the
in cool and knows where Brad Pitt is. Uh Yep. Which , it's just such a great opener
for Brad Pitt there where he's like, like, what is he doing?
He's like teaching cards. He's. No, he's teaching cards. He's
to nineties television stars. . Yeah. Topfer Grace is in this
movie. Yeah. As Topfer Grace. Yes. But also like, those were key. I mean, at least one of those was
from like Dawson's Creek. Uh, there's like a one Tree Hill guy.
I don't know where the girl's from, but probably, I don't know. Party
of five. I don't know. Topher Grace, though was from that seventies show. . Yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna
be real with Theo Topfer. Grace was the only one I recognized. Uh, thus proving that I am indeed
the, the, the one true, uh, uh, American in this one. Uh, quick. Quick, what are her people's feeling
on that now hen show? Oh. Uh, I did not bother to watch it. Me neither. I don't really plan to. I don't think it's come out yet. Uh, I I thought it did. Oh,
wait. Oh, wait, wait, wait. No. That eighties show did
that nineties show has like reap like Donna's there. It's their kids. Well, well, I have the feeling
it's just gonna be like, they'll be there for one episode,
, and then it's the kids. Yeah. Because that's just how life works. How. Works. I think I saw on Twitter somewhere
that was actually surprisingly good. Which not to say good, uh, . , but when your standards are. So low, so Yeah. Very, very low. Uh, anyway, let's not talk about that movie.
We meet the nineties stars. They get conned out of a
lot of money between, uh, George Clooney and Brad Pitt
there, uh, Danny and, uh, Ryan. Uh, yeah. Uh, and that's when this bank
heist, or not banks, this, uh, casino heist job gets
revealed to Brad Pitt. Because Yeah. And yeah. Uh,
who've at first it's all like, this is a terrible idea. Why
are we doing this? Uh, is it, is it because of the
owner and James? Like, no. Why would it be ominous? I don't
know what you're talking about. Well, it just has a lot of money and
I think we could pull that. Off and like, what else are we gonna
do? So we need a fight against the man. Or you could go back to teach
it drum characters. Which would you rather do? . You wanna die here, we're
in a Yeager. Or, uh. So they fly off to drive off,
presumably to Vegas . Uh, they meet up with, uh, Ruben Tishkoff, who I think he's funding the thing. Yeah. So he has a little bit of backstory that
is easily missed earlier in the movie when they're talking about, uh, Terry
Benedict, the guy who owns the casinos. Mm. Mm-hmm. . Uh,
because there's like a little, like, if you don't pay attention too
much to it and you'll miss it, there's like a story about
how like ruthless Terry
Benedict is and how he screws over business partners
and all that. Uh, yeah. Get the amounts power that he has. Uh, Ruben is actually in the
background of one of those photos as like the people he screwed
over. Nice. So he has a, his, he has money and a bone to pick. Yeah. I mean, we get that a little bit
because, uh, uh, you know, he had a, he had a a, what's it called? A casino. Terry Bennett brought it and then
proceeded to blow the fucker up. So Yeah, yeah. Yeah. He's in to screw
over Terry Benedict. And, and make a pretty amount of money. Oh yeah. But. He doesn't, he wouldn't
technically need it. He wouldn't bother if it
weren't for Terry Benedict. Cuz also everyone knows it's impossible
to pull a heist on a casino. Oh. Yeah. Cuz he gives like
the, the funny, uh, yes, uh, backstory of field casino heist. But it also shows, it
gives us the, the, uh, uh, sort of the baseline of
impossibility. So we. Baseline stakes. Really. Yeah. Well, so we as an
audience actually understand, cuz we can all sort of think in
our, our heads like, well, yeah, if I'm in a high movie,
I can totally do this. And these are the characters saying
like, no fuck face, this actually. Is difficult. Yeah. And. You'll get shot. No one would
do this. It is not worth it. Even for 180 million. Mm-hmm.
. Uh, also side note, speaking of nineties
TV shows, Elliot Gould, who plays Ruben Tishkoff is also in
France as Monica and, uh, Ross's dad. Huh? Yeah. Just throw that out there too. . Okay. Hey. He, he was very bumbly, so it amused
me to, to see him in high movie. So Yeah. And it's at this
point really when like the crew starts assembling in earnest, like we kind of get like the
montage of the rest of the, uh, the team recruitment, right? Yeah. We've, we've got some conmen of, um, some people who, I don't actually
think they were brothers. They just had a very
adversarial camaraderie. They were supposed to
be the Mormon brothers. No, they're, they're brothers. Are. They brothers? They're they're
supposed to be brothers. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, and I thought,
I thought they were also the wheel. Men. I love the actors. They
are the wheel men as well. Yeah. Uh, boy, they can do big
distractions and drive a car. Whoa. . And of course they are really
are interested in, um, like, uh, uh, remote controlled ones. Just,
you know, putting that out there. Uh. Really they're all kind of
doing the, a lot of the, the electrical work and all of the. They're they're country boys. They're they're country boys.
They're, they're, they're good. They're good old boys. Uh. Thought they were the conmen and. They're, they're, they're,
they're vehicle, the. Auto, the auto people
were different people. No, no. Nope. They, they're, they're
the vehicle guys because they, cuz they had the little scene where
they had one guy driving an RC car foreshadowing mm-hmm.
and uh, another one driving the
big old monster truck. And they were racing and then like,
it was like clearly a modified RC car. Yeah. Because it got run over by the monster
truck because it was winning the race. Yeah. The. . And thus being brothers. Cuz
that's totally a brother thing to do. Haha. Mm-hmm. ha. Anyway, I see where I've gotten. Confused. But here's the thing.
There is an electronics guy, a dedicated electronics
guy who like, also like, like Moonlights is like working
with like the b I mean, he's, which. I he fucking appreciate. . Yeah. He's a professional
and has loose morals. So good for him. . I mean, I got it when you said he
worked for the government. Um, yeah. . And he and his, I think his
quirk is that he's kinda like nervous. He's very nervous. And also
his like deal seems to be, um, uh, uh, uh, he is a
consummate professional. And that could be for a lot of things. He could be a consum
professional for this. He could be a consummate
professional for that. Um, I don't think he has a
lot of, you know, uh, care for doing it for the right reasons. , nah. But a a
nice payday is, you know, that goes right to his
retirement. Come on. I mean Yeah. But the guy in the. Chair. Yeah, the guy in the chair. General
guy in the chair. He also, later on, he actually has to do stuff. And that
is a potential complication. But, you know, tension, it's a thing that
happens in movies. Uh, they also, um, there's. The. Explosions expert. Yeah. Explosions. Uh, who does explosions and is, uh, uh. For some reason and cockney, British. . Yep. Even though
the actor, actor is not. And played by Don Chle. He, he. Yeah, he is. Hey, Don Chle. And. And they happened. Yeah. I think they
knew that he was in town already. Yes. Because, uh, they, there was
one guy they definitely wanted, but there might be an issue
with his availability. Yeah. It's cuz everybody knew about the heist
that was gonna go down. Which I, I, it's kind of a cute, like, nod to the fact that they're
all in each other's lives. this is a community. It's a small business. Yeah. Yeah. But, uh. Oh, they tried to get that one guy, but
he's dead. That's okay. I did his wife. Yeah. Yes. Well, uh, that, that comes up in a
little bit, I think, um, because, well, first they, they have to recruit Don
GTO's character because, uh, by, uh, basically getting him out of being
arrested because their highest mm-hmm. goes wrong. . Uh. Uh, and there's a great moment
of, uh, uh, Brad Pitt. No. Yes. Yeah. Yes. Uh. Yes. Brad, what, what can you make with
why I just stepped you? I was like, I've already made it. . Yeah. You, because it's just that good. That is the thing that's kinda
like a through line for this movie, is that each character is
really good at what they do. Mm-hmm. . And, and it's very good at introducing
early on why they're good at it. Yeah. Yes. Well, the, the, the
character recruitments is
kind of like a brief on Yes. They are good at what they do. Um. Because we see, uh, , his name just fell in my head a
fucking gun. Don Chle, uh, , uh, we see him make a bomb out of
whatever was able to fit in his hands behind his. Back. Uhhuh. . Yep. And
knew that was already gonna be asked. They also recruit, uh, an acrobat, uh, and we introduce him in a
middle of a show where we, he see him doing acrobatics and
putting himself in small spaces. Yeah. Which is important for the plot. important for the
heist. Yes. Because like, uh, Danny Ocean was not really
sure about this guy. And then he sees his acrobatics and
contortion. It's like, ah, this is why. And you say he's into crime. Convenient. There are a couple of Conors Saul. Oh. Yeah. Old Timer, who's the
old dude. Yeah, yeah. Um, he was coming back for this gig. Yeah. One last gig. Like, he, he
came in because like, hey, it's, it's, it's, it's $10
million easy. Come on. Uh, and that's, at this
point they have Ken, but. We. Need more. But we need, do we need
more? More? Do we need one more left? You think we need one. More? I think we need one more.
. Uh, so they go and grab, uh, this young up and comer sort of a guy. His name's Linus. Recommended by the best in Le Biz. Yeah. His dad is also, uh, a crook, uh, sir, not. Hearing this film. . Uh, but he doesn't like,
uh, Linus trading in on his name. Linus is played by, uh,
Matt Damon, little Babyface. And I I resent this movie for
putting Brad Pitt and Matt Damon in the same. Film. . Because that means I have
to tell them a fucking part. . Really? That's nice. Well, two nonwhite guys. Let's
have some, uh, variety. Uh, but also they look the same to me.
. Oh. So at any given moment, I'm not sure. They Oh, they are, uh,
very different looking. Matt, Matt, Damien has a more round hound
face. And Brad Pitt is fairly angular. They're both white dudes with blonde hair. I don't think Brad Pitt
really has. Okay. I'm sorry. Anyway, one from Boston has aside. I mean, if you, the team is. Having our family. . What, what. Anyway, so the team gathers now, and that's when we get
everybody in on the, uh, 150 mil or 180 mil whatever, uh, uh, uh, payday that is stealing
from the casino vault on the big fight night in
only a couple of weeks. It's fine. Do not worry
about it. . Yeah. So they're patting stuff. They're,
you know, they've set up a, a mock of the vault, uh, you know. To practice inpractice to
practice. And that's all practice. That's all that's happening. Practice sing. Just practice. Mm-hmm. . This isn't a setup for later in the movie
when we get the awesome heist reveal moment. Nope. Ignore the throwaway line about
how it's a bigger thing than that. . Ignore it. Ignore it. What's. Not moving so fast right now? It is. Well, that's, that's how heist
movies work really well. When, when, when they work well, it's like all the
police, all the clues were there, Mr. Policeman, uh, , um,
yeah. All the clues were there. It's just, you know, you're just wrapped up in the plot and
the action and just how fast it's all going and all these
charismatic characters, you're
just in it for the ride, man. And then, because you
had all these pieces in play, as we kind of will cover more
and more here as we go on, because of the pieces in
play, you'd kinda buy the, the, the, the switcheroos or, uh,
just the heist reveal at the end. Uh, because it's like, oh, yeah,
yeah. That, that makes sense. I, I think I saw something
earlier. Uh, it doesn't, it doesn't break your believability
budget. Mm-hmm. . It's like they aren't super
people. They're just highly, highly competent. More
competent than me. The audience. Yeah. If a movie mo moves fast enough, you can get away with a
lot. So much. Oh, yeah. You don't want the story
to slow down at all. Cause that gives the audience
too much time to think. Well, well also, oh. Go on ca Case in point, like,
uh, for, for the heck of it, because I just finished another, uh, uh,
book trilogy. I decided to load up, uh, uh, the, the Lies of
Locke Laora Nice. For, uh, for a reread mm-hmm.
. And like, there's a big twist kind of, that happens in the
latter half of the book, but chapter one, uh, dis not, not including like prologue
stuff Hmm. But chapter one, there is set at play that reveals like , that, that, that reveals
that. Like, that, that the, the, the twist was coming from chapter one. Yeah. Uh, the per, yeah. Uh, or even in Glass Onion, uh, spoilers of people haven't watched it yet, but we all literally see
the glass switch happen. It happens on screen in front of us. Yeah. Yeah. That's so amazing to me. It moves so fast and the next thing
happens and the next thing happens, uh, that you forget about
it. So when it's shown again, uh, with the story, you're like, oh, that must have been edited
in what happened? Oh. . Different vibes. But yes. You get away with just showing
it in your audience every thing and . And then
they'll still be surprised. Well, it's, it's the classic magic
trick. Um, yeah. You know, it's, it's distraction. It's,
you know, it, it's all. Misdirection. Misdirection. Oh, I fucking
love misdirection. Which is. Also, look what, uh, uh, what, look
at what's in this hand. Not over here. Don't look over here. I know. I, I, I guess, uh, just to, uh,
uh, talk about La Lamore again, because, you know, it's a fun book. Uh,
spoilers, uh, abound for that. Um, like there's active, like
heist hijinks happening, which are more interesting in chapter one. But then there's like a line about like, and this thing goes flying by and me, the reader going back and,
you know, rereading again, knowing what full Well happens
later on in the story goes like, ah, that is important , but what not relevant to the scene
at hand right now. So I just, you know, and on the, on the first
reading, just Ignore it. It's like, ah, that's, that's just flavor.
It's, it's describing the town. Oh, I do love flavor text. But it's critical flavor text . This is also why rereading or
rewatching things is great. Yeah. Uh, always go back to old
things. You learn new shit. There. Should there, there needs to be like more heist video
games or heist video games at all? I don't, I don't think we have
a You've had like a successful, like, oh. Um, yeah. Like what? There's
a couple of heist games. And like, you Grand Theft
Auto, who has heist? Well, the, the thing is,
for really good heist, there needs to be the twist of, you think
it's going wrong, but actually look, uh, it's been right the whole
time. But with video games, because you are the character.
Mm. Mm-hmm. , you are in the note
usually the entire time it. Has a different vibe. Mm. Yeah. Well wait. Because at the end of the day. Uh, certify, certify pulled it off. That's true. Well, even then, they,
they kind of like hide stuff from you, the player. That's how
they get away with it. But they actually justify that
narratively because the first half of the game is
technically you giving a recap of what happened and
you are given like drugs and therefore your memory's a little hazy. Yeah. Conveniently hazy to forget all the
relevant bits of the heist that you planned. . Listen, it happens. You have adhd,
you have object permanence issues. Uh, so anyway, they
penalized . Yeah. Pep, keep talking about your own issues. What, uh, fuck off . Uh, they make the, the, the decoy practice, uh, vault, uh, they steal a
huge piece of electronics. Well. Uh, they, they steal the electronics because
the first complication that happens is that, uh, the las like, so,
so part of the plan, right, is that basher is going
to stage a blackout, uh, of the electric grid of the
strip district or not stripped of, of the Las Vegas strip, uh, on the fight
night by exploiting some sort of, uh, weakness in their grid. But is. That the first problem? Uh, major complication. Okay. Uh, the thing that will grind
the heist two a halt. Uh, there's another thing that
happens with, uh, the, the security cameras as
another complication. Yeah. The sewer, I thought was the first
one, but maybe I'm wrong. That. That this is, this is a sewer. Yeah. Go ahead. Oh, this. Okay. I'll. Be over here with my brain because
they're the, because what what happens is, like, he's getting set up,
uh, for his big blackout, uh, uh, part of the, of the
heist. And he sees the electrical, uh, team down there and the, and
basically he goes like, guys, this part of the plan is shot.
They found the flaw . Well, you know what's great though is that
what's happening is it's because of the blowing up of the casino that
brought Ruben into the heist in the first place. Yeah. And he, he, he talks about,
uh, because, uh, the, the who's who did the
demolition did a bad job of, and he got to complain about,
uh, their, uh, theirs shot. He, uh, who their shot demolition for work. . But then, but then the city
repairs it and that's what fucks over the. The other film. Yeah. They,
they, they discover the, the, uh, the flaw while repairing.
Yeah, that's right. Um, but what I super love though is, is a lot of this film is predicated on
the fact that things get to be easy. It tells the audience that this is also
a shenanigan movie. So, for instance, getting the, the blue li blue lines. Hmm. No plans. The plans for the vault. Right. Blueprints. Yeah. Blueprints. Thank you. Should technically be so
incredibly difficult as to scotch, the entire plan from the beginning. But
literally they go in and they're like, Hey, can we borrow these and like, keep
them overnight so we can photocopy them? And they're like, yep. Sure thing. Danny. And that tells
the audience that, okay, there's one, these people leave
charmed lives and stuff like that. Therefore the problems they encounter
are incredibly huge problems cuz they couldn't get around that. But also it, it kind of like gives the audience
free rein to be like, okay, I'm gonna eat some popcorn.
Sit back. This is fine. Yeah. That's my paragraph. . Uh, so because of that, they steal a huge bit of electronics
that's gonna make the blackout still. Work. And e nmp basically. What you think with the power of that e
emmp would be more high. What would be, uh, and, uh, more highly secure area than
the money that they're are, are looking to steal and actually can
probably worth more than the money. Possibly. That's immaterial
to the plan. This. Is why movies move fast. So you
don't think about that part. , uh. , but they steal
it. They, they get the. The thing in, in the course of
it. Uh, the amazing n um, uh, hurts his hand, uh, in the van door. Oh. So, so a bunch of other
complications. Right. They have to like, tap into the security network, which involves our electronics
guy who is not a field guy new, uh, uh, having to go in manually
to tap into the wire, uh, network. Yeah. Uh, he, he's comfortable
in his chair. Not out there, but he manages good for him. Him, yeah. Good for him. He grows. And in the middle of all this, you know, Barrett pit is also chewing on food.
Constantly. Constantly. I assumed, I assumed to keep him from chewing
on the scenery . Um, but also, uh, it turns
out that Danny Ocean's, uh, not yet ex actually wife. I thought they were, I thought they
were divorced cuz he, she sent him, she sent him the papers in
jail. She said she'd write. But I'm not sure he signed them. Oh. You know, he has a bad
habit of doing that in films. Hmm. Uh, but it turns out she's
dating the casino boss. Bomb. What? Danny has ulterior motives. Yeah. I took bz like, is this about Tess?
And he's like, it is not about Tess. I'm like, are you sure
it's not about Tess? I am pretty sure it's not about
Tess. It was, it was about Tess. It was totally about Tess. Totally. But yo know, you swear
up and down, it's fine. But it's a good plan. So even if it's
about Tess, I mean, come on, come on. Yeah. It's fine. Yeah. Listen, Danny swore that he wasn't gonna do
crime again because with his wife. Uh, so clearly he has to be doing
crime for a different reason. . Yeah. Right. I mean, him
a liar. You call him true revenge. You calling him truth or, yeah. Here's the thing. I don't think that
he necessarily had the intention. Like, if she wanted to get back with
him, that would've been cool. But I think he just genuinely
didn't want her to end up with that guy. Cause she. But that still made the
ulterior motive about. Tests. Oh yeah. Absolutely. All you were gonna say. Uh, well, I'm just gonna continue on,
on with the, uh, uh, complications. I think, uh, Brad Pitt gets, it
gets marked or at some point. Oh, I thought Danny. Did. Danny, Danny gets marked. Oh, yeah. Yeah. By Terry Benedict . Yeah. Cuz he goes up to Tess
at the restaurant. Yeah. Uh, but. Here's the thing. I kind of get the feeling now that that
was all part of the plan as we get to the later part of the movie. What? Ooh. Danny's the misdirect. Well, like, wasn't it,
uh, like Danny didn't, uh, the kid Matt Dam have to replace?
Brad had Brad Pitt's, uh. Role. Yeah, but. The thing. But you made that. Or was that because it was Danny got made? Well, Danny got made because he went and saw
a test and at that point Brad Pitt was all like, you're off the team.
So they had to do the switching. Yeah. But like, yes, he's off the
team. He was not the lead. However, remember that when Linus, uh, uh, the, the elevator stopped
and he saw, uh, Danny, he saw all like, really?
And he's like, yeah, we had to see if he were trustworthy. . Oh yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. He's a kid. Yeah. Yeah. He's a kid. But also this is a
training. This is a training. Exercise. . Yep. . Listen you, it's on the
field. Experiential learning. You know how, oh my God. Here's
the real question for you. How much of the reason he's there
is because his dad's like, listen, he's a good kid, but he's never been
in one of these things. Do you like, I thought I know you, his. Dad weren't on good terms. Hmm. I thought
he and his dad weren't on good terms. Oh, I. Don't know. I don't, I dunno
if that was that deep pip. I think it was just he didn't
wanna cash in on his dad's name. Or like his dad. I could see why his
dad wouldn't. But at the same time, I could also very much see why would they
bring a new guy in when they know the best and the biz? What if
his dad's like, listen. , I done. Yes. Like my hand got the shakes. . But you know,
he needs some training. Do you think maybe you could bring
him in? He is. He's really good guys. I'm like, okay. He's good. But he's green. . Exactly. I I think
that would be very funny. But yeah. Uh, are are we
at the fight night now? Uh, yeah. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Why? Fuck not all right. Yeah. So there's everything's, everything's going that night.
Oh, these other things, uh, is our, our old man con man, uh, Saul, yep. Yeah. Had asked
Terry Benedict, uh, in, in the persona of like a weapons dealer
or something to store very valuable, like presumably blood diamonds or
something, uh, in his vault, uh, that night. Uh, presumably
for a lot of money or just, I dunno, whatever. It, it was a good enough ruse that
they were allowed to store a, uh, uh, a, a package inside the vault, which conveniently are the
explosives that are acrobatic will be using to blow up
the door, I think. Right. Slowly gone and blowing
the buddy doors off. But it also allows them to keep
an eye on the cameras that, uh, the security cameras that they're
actually seeing. Yeah. Uh, and on the guards watching those cameras. So a bunch of stuff's happening
all at once now because like, uh, we got, uh, Danny being followed by security and
then eventually being taken to a guy to be softened up for a while, but
turns out is in on the take. Uh, so. Doesn't that, wouldn't that make it 12? Technically? 12. 12. Here's the
thing. You could, if, if you, you could theoretically call it 12 if, um, you like start, it'd be more
than that if you start counting like, what about the guy who helped with the
uh, uh, uh, stealing the blueprints? Like he's not Yeah. We don't count hirings.
How about that? Yeah. Okay. Wow. They weren't contractors. . Yeah. Subcontract
ocean subcontractors. . Yeah. There's a plot for you. Uh, so yeah. Uh, but you know, he starts softening up Danny and then
basically gives Danny an alibi for this entire operation cuz he's
quote unquote beating Danny up and he's just, you know,
slap fighting himself. Uh, Matt Damon. Uh, he is posing as a, uh, uh, gaming commission guy. Yeah. Uh, to let Terry Benedict know that hey, there's a felon dealing cards.
Who's Bernie Mac's character. Frank. Yeah. Yeah. Frank. Which in turn gets Linus in
position behind security. Mm-hmm. . Yep.
Uh, and gets, uh, yeah. Linus into the insides because they
had to do this and Oh gosh. Go, uh, he left a thing behind. He'll go
back and get it. You go ahead. Yeah. And then he's left it fucking alone. . Well, part of it is
also ensuring that, uh, uh, there's so much stuff happening to
distract the machine that is Terry Benedict, that there can be these
opportunities for him to fuck up. Yep. So there's the gay night, there's the Danny Ocean showed up to
fuck around with his love life, uh, . There's, you know, uh,
there's the high roller, there's this, there's that. Now even though all of
them are also necessary for the heist, they're also all there specifically
drawing attention to themselves, to the guy that at the
beginning, remember, uh, uh, what's this at the bankroll said,
don't let him see your face. Don't let him get near you.
Don't let him know who you are. Every single one of those
fuckers, for the most part, either ends up in there or
directly getting in Terry's face. But anyway, uh, makes a good sequel.
Sequel fakes a heart attack. Mm-hmm. . Oh yeah.
Oh, and Al what you say. Oh, I said makes a good sequel hook. weird. What? Like, but we don't know the, that he's faking a ha
hard. We, we the audience. No. Although cause. Rewatch. There was a setup. Yeah. Go on. Yeah. There's like a moment
earlier where he is like a little shaky. But on rewatch, I also noticed that we see
him perpetually. Uh, uh, uh, what's that thing where you're in
character like all the time? Um, method. He's method. We see him
being method earlier as well. So it makes total sense that, you know, obviously his character who's going
to have our attack later is feeling something now. It's part of the reason
why he soak good at what he does. Yeah. He's an expert. He's
the best at what he does. For you. Yeah. So then Linus, uh, oh, uh, the two brothers, uh, get the amazing yen in
a box as one does, uh, which is supposed to have some
money from some takes, uh, and gets that down into the
vault. Uh, this special vault, cuz this is the boss's money. Yeah. How
much air has he got on there? ? Not. Enough. 30 minutes. He has
30 minutes of air. Uh, yeah. He has a little air tank
in there. He's fine. Yeah. He's fine. He's fine. He's the
amazing yen, right? Yeah. Uh, who, uh, Terry Benedict. I don't
think he ever actually sees. No, no. Like there are some of them that
don't get seen, but they are sure. On. I, I just. Oh, I'm like the idea, the
amazing Yen being the one to. the performer. Walk. Away. . Yeah. Um. The, uh, oh, Wal Sal's having the heart attack and
Brad Pitt comes in as a fake doctor and be like, he's dead. Jim. Uh, that's when, uh, that video feed that we had talked about
earlier being interrupted gets cut into and we get the classic, uh, uh, video loop of their replica vault,
uh, being shown on the screen. Yep. So everything looks normal. . Yeah. And, but
yeah. What's in there, what, what's actually in the vault
is the, uh, amazing yen, uh, stealing ship ,
uh, setting up the vaults. Danny and Linus, uh, get down there to Oh, blow
it from the other side. Not quite yet, because that's when the E M P goes
off and chaos ensues. . Upstairs. Another distraction. Cuz not just an e M P going off in turning off
all the lights and the cameras in a casino that's actively,
I mean, uh, chef's kiss. Oh yeah. I mean, this is just information
overload for mm-hmm. , Terry Benedict, which is why the con and
the trick works at the end against him. Mm-hmm. , despite him being a very observant
and very smart character. Mm-hmm. . Yeah. But yeah. Uh, it. Does take 11 fucking guys to
distract . Yeah. One wife. Yeah. To steal 50, 150 million. Yeah.
Makes sense. That's why you need 11. Uh, so we got, uh, uh, the, the, the team infiltrates the vault. Uh, we
got a little bit of a tense moment with, uh, was it the amazing yen? Uh, yeah. He got, uh, caught on the door because
of the wrapping on his, uh, injured hand, which. He only got because the new kid, uh, decided to fuck around and get
and find out by the out . And I think that he got left with the
brothers specifically to see how he deal with annoying shit. Yes. Yeah, I thought so too. It was a test and he failed. Whoops. He failed. He got to make up for it later. I mean
mm-hmm. , come on. Uh. I would like to go back and rewatch to
see when exactly they made the switch to Danny being part of it. Like,
or being, um, you know, the, the guy who got made when they
decided they couldn't really, like, they couldn't trust Linus
with that aspect anymore. I dunno. Do you feel like
it was in it from the, you think that was the
plan from the beginning? Because Danny was always gonna be made
because, uh, of his connection to. Tess. Yeah. Fair enough. Yeah, that's
true. Because you can't predict Tess. She's not part of it. She could just
walk down and then see like, Danny, what the fuck are you doing here? But also Terry Benedict being
a smart man, knows who is, uh, that current mm-hmm. ,
uh, girlfriend's ex is. Well, he knew that he knew when Danny
was supposed to be coming outta jail. Mm. Yeah. Yeah. He's done his homework.
Uh, but anyway, anyway, uh, we get kind of to the big
climax in the movie. We get, uh, Brad Pitt calling Terry Benedict to be
like, Hey, I'm the guy who's robbing you, uh, tells 'em that, uh, they're
leaving half the money in the vault, which as the viewer we're kinda
like, wait, what the heck? It wasn't the plan for all
of it, what's going on? Uh, but tells Terry that they're leaving half
the money in the vault with a bunch of explosives and they're
taking the other half. Uh, and actually his team is to place
the other half in this convenient, uh, unmarked van out front of the casino.
Uh, if you do anything to the van, uh, you know, both bags blow up. If you try to take the
bags early from the vault, they both blow up that kind of, you know, interfere and you lose
all the money. Threat. Yeah. At this point, uh, Terry Benedict's,
uh, crew, you know, they, they call 9 1 1 SWAT arrives. We get treated to like a big, um, like radio conversation of the SWAT
team that's going to try and, you know, take out the team that's in the vault.
We hear gunfire and then an explosion. And then we get a radio from the
SWAT team saying the money's blown. Uh, and that's when Terry's
like, okay, screw this. I want the other half of the money. Hey team that's been follow my security
team that's been following that unmarked van, get my money from
the van, uh, . So, uh, yeah. So, so they, uh, basically trace down the van to the
airport and then that van blows up and that's when you get the big, uh, reveal that neither of
those cases had money in it. What, what? You shocked me sir. It was hooker, sir. I
think that's what it was. Gosh. Uh, I'm trying to
remember what the actual. Like concor. No, no. The, the actual, the the, the
money was actually removed by, you know, cuz the, the, the, the, the spoilers, the SWAT team was actually the heist crew. What. What? And so in the guise of
taking out their equipment, that's actually bags full of money
and they drive away in the SWAT van. Hell. Yeah. Uh, and Danny smooth as ever returns back to
where he is being quote unquote beaten up. And that's when we kind of get
the final, uh, trick of the movie, right? Mm-hmm. . Because like, you know,
we, we know that the, the heist team has had control of the
cameras this entire time, right? Mm-hmm. . Yeah. So Danny being a
clever guy, uh, oh, oh, oh. And now actually, uh, Brad Pitt, uh, runs into te who recognizes Brad
Pitt cuz I mean, of course, uh, friend of Danny's, um, he tells her to go watch like
channel 66 up in the Bellagio suite or something. Uh, so she is up there watching
the security feed as Danny, you know, has this confrontation
with Terry Benedict. And you know, Terry's like, did you take my money?
And, uh, we have Danny going like, would you give up Tess
for the money? And Terry. Benedict, at no point does he admit
that he took the money. No. He goes, I know people who can find it. Well, that's what, that's his answer at
the end. He doesn't say directly, uh, beforehand before he just
kind of is . He, he does some clever word
of evasion beforehand. Uh, but he kind of gives Terry Bennett
the, uh, the choice like, Hey, would you give up Tess
for that money? Yes or no? And Terry being , our antagonist
of the piece goes, oh yeah, duh. In a. Yeah, like a bad habit. Ha ha ha
ha. I'm not a good person. Uh, that's why it's okay to steal this
money from me. Ha ha ha. Um, ha ha. And that's when Danny goes, I
didn't take any of the money, but I can maybe get in touch with
a guy and he'll find out, like, who would be able to pull this job?
And then we get Terry going like, ah, so you know, a guy, I think you've broken
your parole Mr. Ocean. And then Danny goes back to jail
for three to six months. . Well, cuz he has broken his
parole just by being in. By alarm. Yeah, he did. Uh. Well just by being in, uh, Las Vegas,
which is the thing they can prove. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, so, uh, yeah. The, the, the team is each 15 million
richer. Good for them. Yeah. Uh, Tess breaks up with, uh, Tony Benedict. Yeah. Uh, Terry.
Ben because Terry, listen, that's why I hesitated , uh, uh, Benedict Arnold, listen, I I had a
lot of thoughts anyway. Anyway. Uh, that's a lie. I hadn't none. ,
uh, yeah, she breaks up with him. Everybody gets 15 million. Danny
goes back to jail for a little bit, but when he gets out, do you
know who's waiting for him? Rust. Rusty, rusty . Yes. . Uh, and I guess also Tess in
the back of the car, whatever. Like you do, uh, . It,
it, it was nice. It was nice. Um, I, I I think it was a nice
little end in the movie and, and they kind of go driving off into
the sunset being tailed by the same two security goons of, uh, Terry Benedicts. So there's a little bit of
openness at the end. Ha. Whoa. See, that's Ocean is 11. Damn. I think we talked about this for longer
than we usually do. . I mean. Listen, this is, this is what happens
when I don't do the story summaries. . Ooh. She called. Yeah. Wow. Shots fired. It was a
collaborative effort. Piping. . Listen, usually I go like,
and some stuff happens in the middle. , but this is a heist. The stuff happening in the middles all
like part of the, the game. I mean, it's, it's part of what's
happening. Yeah. Like, you can't just skip to
the end of the heist. It's like skipping to the
end of the magic trick. He's not wrong, I suppose. I mean, listen, heists are storytelling magic tricks
that I'll stick by that as far as my philosophy. . , uh, it's a
problem. Free philosophy. Yes. Uh. So so that's our movie. Yeah. That that is, that is whether
it's our movie, who knows , that is that it is the movie. So I guess we, we, we've kind of talked about like a lot
of little storytelling beats and stuff like that. Uh, and lessons
learned as we talked about it. Do we wanna just go right
into what things we change? Yes. I have a thing. Mm-hmm. . Okay.
Mm-hmm. . So I'm not sure you noticed what, but this movie is kind
of a dude fest. What. What what I just, cause they say Tess's it or
his or theirs or some dudes multiple times and they have Julia
Roberts and she gets what, three lines? Yeah. Little things like that. She, that's
the reward at the end of the film. Little thing I picked up some of, like. That I picked up some of your
effects. That kind of shit. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. like, almost as if if she just
didn't appear in the movie, it wouldn't have changed anything. Yeah. If, as if she, if you
replace her with a sexy lamp. Oh, what. Sexy lamp there. Although there is one scene where she
gets to be not just a sexy lamp and it's where, uh, uh, she is in the suite with Benedict
Benedict on the phone and he like comes up behind her and he's like,
what are you thinking about? And there's just this wonderful pause
where she's just like you and it's like, you fuck her. You are not thinking
about him. Beautifully done. One word. Ugh. Again, she's a classic. That's, I think she's,
oh, that's a, so that, uh, so you were saying in replace with
the sexy Amp, her, her, the, uh, all they're slightly loose. Aza. Sorry. It flickers a bit. Hey, what I think, uh, in,
in fairness to the sequels, I think she kinda is like
the 12th, for instance. To be fair, I have not seen the sequel. Wow. Same. Except obviously, uh, oceans,
whatever the, the, the prequel eight. No, not the prequel. The Sister. Ocean's Eight. I haven't seen that yet. Either. Oh, so fucking good. Mostly because Kate Blanchett
does an amazing Rusty . . Um, they have fun. I mean, it's
a fun movie. It's a heist movie. It's gonna be fun. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, I mean I, I would be content with just
giving Tess a bigger role, uh, but in a perfect world there would've
been some women on the heist. what? I mean Yeah. There's so much room to
kind of do some swap outs in that regard. Definitely. You could have had like, uh,
fraternal twins as your, uh, as your, uh, vehicle experts for instance. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Amazing Yen could have been a chick
because we're tinier, uh, generally, uh, and can fit in and more. Uh. Yeah, no, uh, you're absolutely right. Uh, I think for pretty much
all these characters when
probably why Oceans Eight was a thing that could happen. Not,
not that that came out wrong, but you know what I mean, um, is that you could just swap out genders. Were most of these characters mm-hmm. and it would
still work just fine. Oh. Yeah. So what you're
saying is Ocean's Lamp. Ocean's Lamp. Uh, there we go. Perfect. . Mm-hmm. perfection in the
bottle. Uh, yeah, I agree. I agree. I think if you're ready to do it today, I think you can just have a
much easier time swap stuff out. Cause I wonder if also part
of it is being held back by the kind of shackles is
over dramatic, but like, uh, the shackles of it being a remake of
the original movie that what came out in the sixties. Mm, yeah. Well that just like trying to make a
movie out of 12 Angry Men . Yes. To be fair, it, the title's right there. The, it's right in the title. Um, so I think part of it's being held
back by that in that regard. Yeah. But still, and, and 2000 ones like the
point in time where we're starting to, you know, be like, Hey guys, we, we
can, we can make this a bit more, uh, equal and still gonna be
just fine. Come on, . Well, although as you may
recall, uh, what's his head, uh, even our beloved John Elaney had a
whole bit about how you couldn't make Oceans 11 with women,
and that was when Yeah. That was well after these favorite joke.
That was well after this film came out. Oh. Yeah. And then, but before
Oceans Eight, and I believe he's, he's walked back on that joke since. Oh. Yeah. Good. Uh, I forgot about that joke.
I must have expressed it. . . And they can't all be winners . That's true. It's hard, it's hard to write comedy,
you guys. What sounds fake. Yeah. You wouldn't believe it anyway. Um. Uh, but yeah, no, that, that's my major thing
because with such a large ensemble, when it's only one
woman with barely a role, it is extra noticeable. Uh, so cool. Yeah. It just, it's just so noticeable at in
the current times we live in, it's extra noticeable when, when
there's a disparity like that. Yeah. Especially in something that would be
so easy to not be . Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm. because it wasn't
like a commentary on men and and male relationships, which it could have
been. That would've been great. Yeah. It could have been. Yeah. Well, geez. Well then maybe, maybe can, maybe
that can be someone else's change. Because here's the thing that I would
change, uh, one thing I will, uh, kind of talk about a lot is that I
believe that modern storytelling, modern movies can also
talk about how like male bonding and relationships
and stuff like that, that's something we can use
it for, especially nowadays.
Mm-hmm. , you know, tell people.
Hey, you can feel emotions. Wave. It's okay. I don't know about that. Uh. Hey friends, let's, let's get these
chains of the patriarchy off of you too. . Yeah, yeah. No, I, I think
that's completely valid. I think we get like a little
bit of that with, uh, uh, uh, Danny and Ryan's, uh, or Danny and Rusty's, uh, relationship. It's kind of played off as more
banter in the original movie here. But I feel like you could play
with that a little bit more. There could be like a lot more feeling
of betrayal from Rusty with the whole entire, like, is this revenge?
Is this all fucking revenge? Look? I. Bet, I bet. Yeah. . But you need to understand
heists are a form of love, language for men. . Not men. God damn it. Intricate wrist
trolls. . Oh, that's true. That's an excuse. That's true.
The intricate rituals. Yeah. Watch out for those
fuckers. Yeah. So intricate. So I feel like in, in an ideal
world here, you could probably, uh, pat out the run time some, uh, because it's actually a fairly efficient
movie when it comes to the run time. I think it's like clocks in a cool
hour and a half and it's done. Um, um. According to the Wikipedia page,
I have open, it's 116 minutes. Well then nevermind
almost two hours. , we could, yeah. Here, here,
here's the thing. Uh, but. It feels faster. Mm-hmm. download. Yeah. Cuz a
lot happens toward the end. My god. Uh, we could probably trim down some
other scenes in favor of character. Whoa. Uh, cuz here's the
thing. Uh, I, I, I mentioned, uh, uh, starting up La Lamore again, just the interaction between
all those characters. You get the vibe that
they know each other. They've grown up with each
other basically for years now, and they have like a lot of this banter
with each other. And it's just fun. Mm-hmm. . Yeah. And so, like, the vibe that this movie goes for in the
original is a lot more like we are all professionals. Uh, we will go our separate
ways after this and be on for, uh, friendly terms, but like, not like
close or anything like that. Uh, I feel like they could, you know, through the adversities that
is doing a successful major heist form. Like the bonds
of friendship. Come on. Yeah. Yeah. I, uh, I I do think, uh, homosocial environments are important. Yes. Uh, you know, for women and for men, but having displaying
what it could look like on screen would be towards the good. Uh, because I suspect, I don't know, but I suspect men don't super
know what to do with each other. That's just like the human condition, man. Uh, well, well, well. Here's the thing. When I'm
with my, uh, uh, women and, and assigned female birth
friends, you know, we will, uh, compliment each other to
tell the cows come home, uh, positive affirmations. Uh, which is another reason why
the mani joke does not work. Cuz that's not actually
how women treat each. Other outright. Sexual
flirtation, let's be honest. Oh, yeah. But I get the sense that
that's not a huge dude thing. And actually that's, and. I might be wrong because I'm not a
dude, so I don't get to hang out in. The different spaces. Like, uh, that stuff like that takes like a lot
of time and letting guard down and all that. Um. Whereas we to like women, we have
never met in the fucking bathrooms. We. Are drunk in the bars bathroom. My
girl, you look so amazing. He doesn't, him doesn't. He doesn't. I like how you and
I went with the same storyline. He does not deserve you. I
would fuck you right now. You look so good. You're. So pretty. Figure talk. Is inside your mouth. Yes. Uh, you're, it's kinda
like how, uh, Helen, uh, talks to whiskey in glass onion. Yes. Exactly. Like that. Yeah. Uh, but
also, um, I, I do wanna, uh, uh, compare and
contrast this a little bit. I don't wanna go down into the
weeds with this, but so, uh, uh, me, um, ,
but you can have films. You can have media that have
all, you know, single social, uh, single sex casts where they
actually do important shit. And it's not just about like throwing
women out the window. Uh, case in point, our flag means death. There's
like, what, two women maybe. It Yeah. As long as like, the point is
also exploring relationships mm-hmm. and all that.
Mm-hmm. then. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. Yes. It has to
be the point. Mm-hmm. Hmm. , it has to be, there has to be an on purpose
and intentional working at the unpacking the decision. Like Yeah.
Ass supposed to be like, well, obviously there's equal numbers
of people. Look, there's 10 dudes. And Sandra Bullock not say, well,
not Sandra Bull. I'm sorry. Uh, Julia Roberts like, see equality.
Which gets back to that, like, that study where like, if there are equal numbers of women
and men in a conversation, uh, the men think that the women
are dominating . Whereas if there are like five dudes
and two women, that's considered equal. fun times. Yep. Anyway, um. Let's stare to something to
your, more, to your fault. . Uh, I'll go next. A quick crime. . Hey. Hey, PIP, you
know what? I thought you, uh, didn't what you didn't
do for your change. That, that was really the, uh, your brand. He, I thought about mentioning it, but
then I decided we'll save it. , you're gonna throw the bone for that one. Yeah. Well, I'll, I'll pick up
that bone and someone else will, will pick up . Sorry. Hold on. Yeah. Uh, listeners. You, you,
you knew where I was going. , uh. Well, in case they don't. Mean I didn't. Uh, well, I'll pick up
the bone you dropped. And then someone so someone
else can pick up someone else's bone in the, with the, in
the sexual innuendo sentence. Uh, boner. Yeah. . Yes. And also with it. You, anyways, you're. With it. Because, you know, there, there's this, this tension and going
on between, uh, in, uh, Danny and Tess, that's
mm-hmm. . Mm-hmm. . So
we need to, we need it's some, uh, contrast to that we need. It is,
um, uh, beginnings of a new love. Mm-hmm. . Mm-hmm. . Mm-hmm. .
And so, uh, , like, uh, some of the, the crew should
be making ads at each other. Yeah, they should. Oh, yeah. Like, but the question is who. All of them? I mean, I feel like Linus and Rusty makes
sense. Well, here's the thing, and that you're right. I'm gonna just
say straight out, you're right. Um, of course, because Danny's
got eyes for Tess. Right? But Danny and, and, uh, rusty, they've had a long term like
whatever background thing. But Rusty, he needs to come. You know, he spent
all this time while Danny was in jail, kind of getting over it, uh, uh, deciding
he was, I think I'm describing like, basically the entirety of the a oh three,
by the way, like . Anyway, uh, uh, he's had time to get over for
this. He's been working at it. Then Danny shows up in his fucking
life again. And what's it about? It's not even for the thrill
of, of hanging out together. It's for fucking Tess again. And he likes
Tess, which is what makes this worse. And then suddenly, here's
pretty boy, pretty boy Linus. And he's gotta teach him how to lie. . I mean, counter
argument. Uhhuh, . Go on. Uh, it is just a starting
of a huge big molecule. Ooh. What are they stealing each
other's hearts. . Oh my God. Now that's a,
ugh. Can you imagine the, the ultimate Valentine's heist You're
thinking of that New Zealand thing, aren't you Pippen. Like. No. What . The taskmaster steal something. Oh, it, it had not crossed my
mind. But that is great. . They challenge each other to
steal, uh, something for as, as a, as a holiday thing. And
unbeknownst to all of them, they each decide to steal
each other's hearts. Yeah. Yeah. The take wa like
who know, who knew who, who knew that at the, that
there, there's more in that take. There was love. . And listeners. That's how you do a cha do a change
without actually doing most of the work. . Yeah. Oh, got us. Yeah. . I, yeah. Fair enough. Good play.
Yeah. Right. Uh, but also if, if leverage taught me anything
mm-hmm. , uh, is that there should be at least
one throuple. . It's true. But can there ever be as good as leverage? No, but no one can be. So it
shouldn't be an impediment to. Others. I see. I see. That makes. Sense. Leverage is an outlier
and should not be counted. Ha. No, I got you. I got
you. I understand. Right. All right. Uh, cat, what do you got? Oh God. Um. . It seems to be no more
fu fruit hanging down here. You might have to reach up a bit more. Oh, you mean I have to make
a reach for something? Me. Me. Yeah. That's no hanging fruit. They're all played by
crayons. Now . Let me get my tarot deck out. Um. All right. How many there are 20
that make our economy, nevermind . Um. Listen, we could have kept going. Oh Lord. Uh, so let's, let's consider. Oceans are kana. . Okay? First of. All, you know, people, we got. You. Think we need a chariot?
You think we need a chariot? ? Holy. Shit. . Um. Did I let the fool in? Yeah. emper. And per it's all coming together guys.
Uh, oh. And we hang 'em upside down, guys. The tower ,
uh, wheel of Fortune. It's all coming together.
Okay. We need to stop this now. Oh, so what's your guys the
tower or earns my and the, uh, when the high starts going wrong. The lightning bolt guys. There's a
lightning boy. What the It's true. Cause the hotel demolishes
and ruins everything but. The moon. Well, I was
thinking the E Emmp, but Yeah. But the moon, moon in the face off,
uh, the moon, but the moon, you know. Fight night. Oh. God, dissection. Oh, I was
thinking, uh, uh, JPL or whatever. They were not at, um, picking
up the, the pinch. Uh, anyways, , but no,
none of that. That's a, that's a different game. Guys.
Purpose of this, of this podcast is to improve or come up or, or
steal. Approve her. Steal. Well, no. Oh no. The purpose of the podcast is that we
can do whatever the fuck we want with It doesn't have to be better. It just has
to be different. That's true. Yeah. I mean, I thought that we were
trying to make bad things better. No, I mean, that's often what we do.
Cuz it's easy and we're lazy by nature. like, uh, okay,
well we want just different. Yeah. Good things. Different. Yeah. Different. Like, cause Kat Kat, what's, what's
the, what's the, uh, title of, uh, this podcast? Uh, oh gosh, I don't, I don't know
guys. Should we say it all together? I'm not sure if I can
remember it without you. No. . Oh, fucking dare you. No,
come on. No star secret. No, you got, the boys didn't do it. And this is why they don't get to hang
out in the bathrooms of bars saying you are so pretty . No,
you're we're. They look so good. They're so good. Dump him. Assuming I'm paying
attention to your bets. . That's fun. . Uh, Jesus. Um, so I also don't wanna go too far into
the, to the, again, into the weeds, because otherwise that becomes the Aeu
game. Um, the alter universe game. Uh, but I think, you know, we could have had a film
that was, um, uh, uh, leaned more into the relationships.
No, I only want to improve her steel. I really like heist. Guys. I
don't know how to write a heist. Did I really want to? Me too, dude. I still have that one story. Oh, which, hi. Wait, you have
a he story. What's that story? Remember we did a, we did an episode about it last year
and I haven't made a lot of progress. Well, and I think Alex has done at
least one heist, cuz he has that f. Well, Alex is murder mysteries. Oh. That's right. Wait,
what's your heist again? Uh, space heist. Spiced. . Spiced. What's that? Dune. Um, do you spice . Hey, spice, do you spice. Spice Spice? What? In your, what Hap
Well, okay, so the point is, I, I like, I don't know how to do that balance. It's
cuz maybe I don't read enough of them. It's free. I watch them. But it's. A free. Card Mon. Um, r a six of
Crows. You might like it. Who's that by? Lior. Dugo. Okay. Does, uh, does PRT have a high Facebook. Does Who? Oh, prt Terry pt. Yeah. Well, does he I don't think so in as much. No. Technically the end of making
money. Uh, or, or Yeah. The end of making money I think
would count as a heist. Um, where he has like the giant
gold, gold gold albums. Yeah. Oh, well, hog father has
a heist. Has a heist gone wrong. That's true. Uh, that's villain heist. All right. Let's, let's talk
about though you're liking Heists. I do like Heists. Um, I think 11
of a lot of people to be honest. And it's almost like, uh, uh, they're, they're pulling the same thing on the
audience as they are on Terry Benedict is just throwing so much at the screen.
That's what I really wanna be able to do, is being able to throw so much that the
audience is just like, you know what? Fuck it. I'm here to eat popcorn.
Yeah, they could have slowed it down. They absolutely could have. They
could have slowed it down. Um, I think the only way to do that would've
been to cut the number of people. Yeah. To cut it down to. Five Max. And even because that, like, how many are in the leverage crew for
real? Five? Yeah. There you go. Yeah. So you can do a heist in an episode.
You could do and still like, but with two hours and you have time to
actually pay attention to people. Um, you have time for each of them to have
an independent relationship with one another. Yep. And I don't, like, Saul is not having an independent
relationship with like, the fucking Mormon voice. Um, you know what he did? He had that, like, one conversation point is it's, we got a kind of togetherness. But
on the other hand, in the film, it was important that
they'd also be able to like, go their separate fucking ways. Um, it was a liability at the time that, you
know, they were closer to each other. , Tess and Danny. Um, but if you wanna slow down and really
make it about people as opposed to the puzzle, um, when there's puzzles involved, I think that you lose
complexity. The more people, either you lose complexity in terms
of people, the more people you add in, or you lose complexity in terms of the
puzzle, the more people you add in. Cuz you have to give one way or the other. The audience can only
take so much brain. Um, so I think it would've been like, I would say the characters
I would want to keep, if I was only keeping five and they
were more about themselves, weirdly, I would make it, I would
get rid of everybody. But Edict, Tess, Danny, rusty, and Linus, I would've gotten
nowhere of everybody else. The entire rest of the crew. I. I would argue I would
keep Basher still as our demolition slash. I feel like he could have been
contract. Maybe, or maybe like what's, what's Danny's actual,
besides being a mastermind? He's a jack of all trades.
He's a, I presum. He. He was the big planner. Yeah. But I, you'd, you'd ha you'd you would also have
to lose some of the confusion. But that also is a, a, uh, an element of losing that number of people
so much like Benedict would, uh, uh, not have that overloaded information. We would not have the overload of
information. We'd have something else. We would have, uh, you know, feelings. You feelings. I know feelings
heist. But also if you consider like the, I I would also say that those
four, with the exception of Tess, and this way, Tess gets more, you
know, anything, uh, those four are the, are the most well fleshed out anyway. Uh, in terms of motivation
in character. There are, there are characters of the
capital C, the Mormon brothers. Those are p what
Rise with P . Those are, you know, characters with
a capital C. Um, they're, you know, they're fun to watch. We don't
know shit about them. Like, you know, you enjoy Provo. I think
you do really well there, , uh, you know, all that
stuff. Um, but you have the, the young Ingenu in the form of Matt
Damon . You have, uh, uh, the old lovers in the form of Rusty
and Danny . You have, uh, and you have the, uh, uh,
the villain and the girl. Now I say the girl that
is again, a problem. Maybe you could get rid of
the girl and, and just, uh, and then you get to have
an extra person, Brent. Uh, but then you're getting
rid of the girl. So, well, we make one of the
others a girl. Yeah. Uh, Benedict's the girl, then she's a villain. And then God can't women do anything
Girl Boss Gas, like, keep . They won't
let us do anything. Uh, so yeah. Uh, I could see that.
To what end? To what end. Uh, just to get more time
to explore the characters. Get to spend some time with them. Is
that the point of a heist? Uh, it can be. It can. What are you stealing
Pippen? What are you stealing? Hearts and minds. There you
go. See what if your point, tire point is not to steal money, but
the fuck with Tony Benedict. I mean, good times and steal the girl .
Yeah. And at the end of the day, girl doesn't wanna be stolen. She
wants to take over. And then meanwhile, there's Danny right there. There's Rusty. Maybe I'll just steal my fucking self. . Right? She's the real
villain all along. Not villain. She's the real Hester Hester.
She's been writing to Danny. The What's the take? My, what's the, take my agency? Ooh. Or. I mean, you could also have
what's the take? Just looks ly me. All right, there you go. Um. I really like this movie. That's, you
know, it, it's got problems. Yeah, that's good. But you also, the problems
that there are are ones that honestly, y'all dressed already. . Yeah. . Sexy Lamp I think is
genuinely the largest one. Agreed. Yeah. That's about it. Um, cool. So I, I have a proposal for a, uh, a game to play real quick. I
want to bring in a meta character, cuz I've had it on my mind
for like an hour. Uh oh, does it? Yeah. So, uh. Uh, does it rhyme? It's Ma Maura? No. Oh. , oh. Interest. This was
after you. You can steal that. Hell, if you want. I. Because right here. My special appearance by mm-hmm.
. Yeah. I'm just, I'm a steering in into this direction
here where we have a meta character join in my, uh, special appearance. Doug Judy. Oh, I was literally thinking
of B nine nine earlier. Haha. Damnit. Doug G's an inspired choice. Because you know what? He would fit right in
really to the ocean's per. Damnit. Like instantly . That's pretty good. He is really good. You know
what though? I'm gonna, I'm gonna bounce off of you Uhhuh.
I really want Perta in here. Now. I want Jake Peralta Uhhuh. I
want him to be like, oh, Judy, is it not just that, but is it. Cool? Sorry, you go on before
I question, uh, your choices. Oh, thanks. Um, no, I like the idea
of, you know, he recognizes Doug Judy, but then, uh, uh, he's starting to realize that what's
happening around him is in fact an Ocean's 11 style heist. But he's referencing the
original movie with the Rush because in, cuz in this universe, I'm
saying that this one doesn't exist. Fair enough. Oh, well, I think it'd be funnier
if actually, uh, uh, Doug, Judy and Jake Prota keep referencing
different oceans at Evan. That would be very funny. Like, how so? Uh, one of them's talking
about the original, one of them's talking about this one. Uh,
and then partly they're realizing, oh, they should have been
talking about Ocean say the. Whole time. And they're like, you know, that was really the superior film . Uh, though I'm also gonna question, is it cheat cheating to pick a
character from the same franchise. Uh, that has never been, uh,
uh, exclusively ruled on? So I'm saying No, I win. What? Fair enough. There you go. And you're, you're lucky. I'm not sure
I'm gonna let this happen again for. You'd have, you'd have to remember. Fuck you . Wow. How dare are you? Wow. No re. Uh, don't mind me as I go into the
cheat sheet for a second. You bitch. . This is the other half
of female president, by the way. , uh, John doesn't quite, didn't quite understand. Yeah. Yeah. That's part of it. Like, there's
hideous, like hideous bag stabbing shirt, but we do it to your fucking face. Yeah. That's only polite, right? How, how will you not admire the
lipstick T-shirt we chose? If we don't stab you
in your face? . How can we see what lipstick
you chose? I mean, come on. Now. What do we know to rifle through
your purse for? Hmm. What? Yeah, I mean, uh, come on.
Mm-hmm. , uh, we need to tell you that you got dressed
up for this. So, uh, Well, I'm going, I'm going for another
obvious one. Mm-hmm. , uh, which is going to be leverage. Oh yeah. Ha ha. Yep. That's right. But not, but
not actually the whole crew. I just want Sophie there doing
one of her own separate gigs. Sophie, because. Uh, more specifically a group of dudes
going like, no, no, you can't do this. It's impossible. And just Sophie coming in with
a character and just taking everything . I appreciate, uh, and like when someone asks her
about it later, she's just like, ah, that was a nice night. Had a. Really nice drink. . . Oh yeah. I, I don't want the
whole crew. I just want Sophie. Legit and I support you. Thank you. There you go. Okay. Al, what do you got? I've got nothing. Uh, . . Uh, let's go with. Come at the fucking frog. Whoa. Left field. Right, because you know what, no one ever expects supp. It's true. See, now I'm picturing Muppet's Ocean
Love. It's great. Muppet caper. Yeah. Yeah. . Yeah. Mm-hmm. . Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. . I Miss
Piggy was performing that night. Ah. Yes. And well, everyone's looking at her
cuz she's great to look at. Mm-hmm. . Uh, Kermit
is pulling the heist. Fuck Kermit's small enough. He doesn't
have to worry about that. Laser grid. , uh, I wanna argue is
that Muppets don't need air. So he could have been, you
know, that box. Yep. Yep. You're right. When
you're right, you're right. Pippin. I mean, see now I'm
wondering if Canonically, uh, the Jim Henson people, uh, have actually said one way or
another if Muppets breathe. Well, that's kind of horrifying to ponder. . Yeah. Listen, I bet they know. Of course they know. Have they ever held they're
they've held their breaths before. But, but was it because it was necessary
for air or because it was funny. Because for the bit. Yeah. For the bit. The bit. Mm-hmm. for the Bit. . You have my ax for the bit. I was gonna say something else about
Muppets, but I forgot it. So we can move. On. Okay. Fair enough.
All right. Yeah. So, so Kermit the Frog is
in on the heist. Yep. This feels like Smash Brothers at this
point. Kermit the Frogs join the heist. . Kermit the Frog. Uh, but the one
who's in that dark hood. Yes. Yes, yes. Oh wait, no, I should
have gone. It's a joker friend. I'm a person on a five. Oh, well, . I mean, you should have gone
with Gonzo, but okay. . Hero. Gonzo's the great Or is
it Gonzo's Magnificent. It's Gozo the Great. Okay. Pretty sure. But he is magnificent. Hell yeah. He. Anyway, um, do we have
anything else about Oceans 11? Nope. Nope. I. Really should watch the sequel.
And everyone should watch leverage. They really should. Yeah, that's
true. Leverage is so good. Hmm. Cause if you wanna know
how to write heists. That's. True. Leverage is the
thing to study. Yeah. Everybody references it. That's. True. And it's not just
heis, but also, uh, explicitly anti-capitalist heists. Yeah. Oh yeah. Like pulled from the news. They had to change
details to protect people. Uh, and the owner, uh, the
showrunners like, yeah, no, we did that on purpose.
Fuck. Billionaires. Run. . . I need to watch the new season. Yeah. . I should
re-watch something. True. All right. Um, before we head
out, do we have anything to shill? Uh oh. Uh, yes, actually, uh, we all do. All of us will be at BusCon,
uh, convention in Massachusetts. Uh, science fiction fantasy. Uh, we sounds fake. . Uh, we will be there and, uh, uh, if you listening audience happen to
be there as well, drop us a line. Uh, we can, uh, uh, either think about,
we can bark on, we can bark on, uh, we could have an impromptu
hang, um, you know, in public places. Obviously. No
Parasocial bullshit in my . Uh. Not my house. No. Uh, so that's, uh, the weekend
of February 17th, I believe. Um, middle of the month. And I believe this
episode will come out before then. Uh, yeah. and, uh, beyond that, uh, I have classes coming up, but, uh,
I think that's the big one. We have, we have a four sibling appearance. Very rare actually, for all of us to
be in the same place at the same time. Especially in Fanish spaces. Except obviously right now when
we're all in the same room. Right. To totally. Okay. Yep. Mm-hmm. , we we're. It's, it's okay. We're all in the same
state. In the same city. in the same
house in the same room. I'm comfortably far away. Street Street, our house.
Oh God. Anyway, so, um, that's our show. That's my show. Uh, I've got, uh, shows coming up, uh, usually about twice a month at
the arcade as part of the, uh, jump button house team, as
well as my, uh, ongoing, uh, uh, select start team as well. And we're doing more shows, uh, uh, spaced out throughout the, the
coming months here. So yeah. Fuck yeah. Keep busy. Good
job. So proud of you. Good job. Well done. Oh yeah. Hey, sometimes
it pays for my parking. Ooh. Listen. Ooh. Well I hear is that it pays. Mm-hmm. . It's true. So, yo, what? Good fucking
job. Way to get it. Way too. Get it. Haha. Okay. Uh, so Pippen, I think you're taking us out. Sure. As always, if you have
an idea or prompt to submit, head on over to No stories
sacred.com/submission. Follow us on Twitter at
No Stories Sacred, uh, or send an email through
contact No stories sacred.com. Your hosts have been Alex McDon,
Brendan Mcal, PIP and McDon, and Katherine Criton editing for this
episode done by Brendan Arch by j Wolf. Show notes in transcript are
available@nostorysacred.com.
Thanks for listening, everyone, and please rate, review
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the 1997 film, George of the Jungle, George. George of. Jungle, the watch out
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and any story can be changed. I'm piping. I'm Alex. I'm Kat. And I'm Brendan. And we're. No, no. Story. Is secret. Secret.